Love Is a Verb: 7 Simple Ways to Put Love Into Action Today

We talk about love like it's weather — something that happens to us. We fall in love. We fall out of it. We wait for it to show up. But the most powerful kind of love isn't a feeling that comes and goes. It's something you do. Love is a verb.

That's the whole idea behind The Love Effect: love can be learned, practiced, taught and shared. You don't need a grand gesture or a perfect relationship to start. You need one small action, today. Here are seven.

1. Start with you

You can't pour from an empty cup. Loving yourself isn't selfish — it's where every other kind of love begins. Tonight, write down three things you did well today. Not perfectly. Just well. Then read them out loud. If that feels strange, that's exactly why you need to do it.

Want a little help? The free tools at UR-Amazing — a Confidence Journal, a Gratitude Garden and a Relationship Health Check — are made for this. You were amazing before you got here.

2. Give one sincere compliment

A compliment can change someone's day. But only a sincere one. Before you say it, run the four-question sincerity check: Is it true? Is it specific? Is it free — with no favor attached? And would you say it when they're not in the room? Four yeses, and it will land.

“Great job” is nice. “The way you calmed that customer down took real patience” is love.

3. Learn to receive love

Most of us wave compliments away — “Oh, this old thing?” — and in doing so, we refuse a gift. Next time someone says something kind, try four steps: Smile. Say “Thank you.” Believe it. Take it in. Receiving love well is part of giving it, because it tells the other person their words mattered.

4. Notice, ask, believe

Real connection with anyone — a date, a coworker, your teenager — comes down to three moves. Notice something real about them. Ask one question that can't be answered with yes or no. Then believe in who they are becoming, and tell them. It takes about sixty seconds, and it's how a stranger starts to feel seen.

5. Put down the phone and meet people

Swiping is easy. Showing up takes courage. Whether you're 21 or 71, gay or straight, single for a month or a decade, love grows faster face to face. That's why every Love Others speed dating night starts with a lesson — how to engage, compliment and present yourself — before you practice it on real dates.

6. Teach it to a child

A child who learns to recognize another person's value may grow into an adult who treats people differently. At dinner tonight, go around the table and have everyone give one compliment to the person on their right: I notice you. I appreciate you. What an accomplishment. Start a compliment jar. Make kindness a family habit — Teach Love has free ideas for families and schools.

7. Share love beyond your circle

Love gets bigger when you give it away to people you'll never meet. Donate a bottle of hope to a community hit by disaster through The Giving Water. Thank the person who cleans your office. Let someone merge. Small acts, multiplied by millions of people, are how the world actually changes.

One person. One compliment. One act of love at a time.

You don't have to do all seven today. Pick one. Do it on purpose. Then do another tomorrow. That's the Love Effect — and it starts with you.